I want a baby

[stacyl]

I am having a SERIOUS case of baby fever. EVERYWHERE i look, there is a new baby, or someone is announcing their pregnancy. I am feeling such a void. I so desprately WANT a baby. My husband and I aren't on the same page. We don't have a SUPER active sex life. (sex happens 1-2x a month, which is not enough for me.) about this time, every month (after aunt flo visits) I feel depressed. I feel empty, and I feel neglected. I don't really know how to get on the same page as my hubby as far as baby goes, and I don't know how to make him see that i need more sex. Any input?

[mommylinz]

I'm sorry you are feeling this way stacyl. Have you asked your husband why he is not ready? Maybe if you understand his reasons you might be more understanding, or if it is something like not having enough money you can set a goal to work towards. That is what we did when I wanted baby #2 and my husband was worried about money.
Good luck!

[ReneeW]

Hang in there. That is really hard on your emotions ... I agree that talking to your DH is an important first step. I heard someone say once that the best way to talk to a man is side-by-side, not face-to-face (which they feel is confrontational). So take a walk or do an activity together and have a good honest open chat, making sure you talk about how much you love your DH and appreciate him etc.

I don't know what else is going on in your life, but if you end up waiting to start a family, maybe it would be easier on you to really throw yourself into some fun projects, volunteer with Big Brother/ Big Sister, become a mentor, or do something that will help you focus on someone else rather than your own feelings of longing ... and that would help you nurture someone else in a really powerful way and make someone else's life a better one. OK so those are my ideas!! Good luck!

[Samantha]

I don't think you should approach him about sex with the concerns of a baby. Maybe if you wanted more sex for the fact its fun and enjoyable he'd probably be more willing and ready. I think you need to both ENJOY your sex life together before throwing the "I want a baby" thing in. You guys obviously need to both want a baby but I think you need to decide if you want more sex because you want a baby or if you want more sex because you enjoy it and really just want more. If it's just for a baby, I think you might run into bigger issues down the road.

So, I think you should work on your intimate relationship with your hubby before working at having a baby then the rest would follow suit. Like Renee said, tell him how much you love him, how much you appreciate the things he does and then.. tell him you think he's super sexy. And don't hesitate to tell him you want feedback as well. Be bold!