4 YO is dreading swimming lessons

[ReneeW]

Hey Ladies!

I'm looking for some advice because we signed my 4YO up for swimming lessons and she keeps saying that she doesn't want to go. (Sigh....) I want to encourage her to do them, but not FORCE her to go and end up in a battle of wills. It's at Foss, and I know they are GREAT at working with kids and making it fun so hopefully the teachers will know what to do when we get to our first lesson. In the meantime, I am hoping for some suggestions on talking to her about it. So far I've just mentioned that it will be fun, that she needs to know how to swim so she'll be safer at the lake this summer etc. but ... she is a stubborn kid and so far she is dead set against it.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!! Thanks --

[dara1012]

I have an almost 4 yo who is often dead set against things. I have found that the harder I push to do something, the harder he pushes back against it (we are both very stubborn). Lately I have been dropping the topic if he seems upset and re-approaching from a different angle a day or two later.

Can you figure out why she doesn't want to go? Is she scared? Is she afraid she won't have time to do something else she likes? A few weeks ago I suggested going to the Children's Museum which DS normally loves he was adamant against going and it turned out he was afraid he wouldn't get to play with his toys after daycare that day. I assured him he would have time with his toys and then he was fine.

Could she pick out a new swimsuit for lessons or a new towel?
What are her motivators? DS loves matchbox cars now, if he cleans up his toys every other night for a week without a fuss he gets a matchbox car or he can pick out a dollar spot item at Target. Maybe you could offer her a small reward or 1:1 time w/ you after swimming lessons?

Good luck!

[sharon]

When my son digs in with something like this it's because he's anxious and I find not talking about it to actually be the best thing. He can't really picture what something will be like until he is there and the more we talk about it beforehand the more anxious he gets. So, instead once we've mentioned that he is going, we just don't bring it up again. And if he does we say something simple like "Yep, I know your nervous. 3 weeks is a long time away though, so we're just not going to talk about it now."

[ReneeW]

Thanks, Ladies!! I will try these out and see how it goes.