|
|
Post by ReneeW on Mar 26, 2012 10:03:14 GMT -6
Hi Ladies! Here I am, once again asking for input.  My question is -- do you have any advice on helping your child's confidence to grow? During recent parent-teacher conferences, my DD's teacher (first grade) gave us some ideas, but I'd like more. Her teacher says that my DD knows the answers but doesn't speak up in class. My DD has always been shy and introverted, and we try to be very encouraging. When she has success I tell her "You should be proud of yourself!" and try to make sure she has lots of situations where she can "shine" and feel her own success, we're very positive in our household (without being ridiculous about it) ... but I wonder if there are other specific things we can do that we're not doing. Anyway, any ideas would be much appreciated!! Thanks! |
|
|
|
Post by slufoot on Mar 26, 2012 13:59:45 GMT -6
Growing up, I was like your daughter, introverted and almost never spoke up in class. I often knew the answers, just never wanted to be the center of attention, so I didn't raise my hand. It's not that I didn't have confidence in my abilities, because I did (and still do) - it's just that I didn't want everyone looking at me (still don't). As long as she can speak up when she needs to, or it's important, I wouldn't worry too much. As an adult I taught, so I got up in front of a group everyday to talk:) Sorry no ideas to help, but nothing my parents tried made me speak up in class more often:)
|
|
|
|
Post by deannemdm on Mar 26, 2012 14:06:35 GMT -6
It sounds like you are doing some great stuff with her already. Is she more introverted (I would guess)? That may be her age or just her personality. As long as she can speak up when shes needs to (and say NO or such) I wouldn't worry too much. Talk to her pediatrician if you are worried about it still.
|
|
|
|
Post by ReneeW on Mar 26, 2012 14:14:01 GMT -6
Thanks, you two. I appreciate that. Because her teacher brought it up I've been thinking about it more. But you offer a good perspective -- she's always been more introverted, the OPPOSITE of a "look at me!" type of kid. Maybe her confidence is fine, she just doesn't like to be the center of attention. I will still try to implement some of her teacher's suggestions. It's weird because I grew up feeling pretty confident, always loved talking in class, never shied away from speaking up etc. (whereas my DD is like my DH) -- so my DD is very different. But ever since she was a toddler I've known she was more quiet and shy and that we'd need to be extra encouraging and mindfully build her up more so than what other, more outgoing kids might need.
|
|
|
|
Post by ladyandrearose on Mar 27, 2012 20:05:52 GMT -6
Renee, I have two small bits of advice. 1. When our DD started karate, her self-confidence and her shyness waned over time. (Actually, sometimes we need to keep her stories to herself, she shares so much now!) Perhaps, karate wouldn't be her thing, but some other activity that she really likes as she sees her skills grow would give her confidence. 2. At my job we have a saying, "With Success comes confidence." The success doesn't have to be huge, even small successes, build confidence. Maybe start with having her answer questions at home with you and your DH and that could make her more comfortable with it.
I was a lot like your daughter, introverted and quiet. When I tell people that I'm shy and quiet, I get laughed at, because they don't believe me. For me to overcome and display confidence, really came from advice bit number two. It was pretty gradual and I didn't really notice when the changes happened to me. Relentess encouragement helped too, although I did resent it at times.
Good luck.
|
|
|
|
Post by sharon on Mar 27, 2012 20:09:18 GMT -6
Sounds like she maybe is just an introvert, which is not a lack of confidence - it's an aspect of temperament. I wonder if Raising Your Spirited Child or another book about temperament might be helpful.
Good luck!
|
|
|
|
Post by merrr on Mar 27, 2012 22:17:07 GMT -6
Does she have a physical attribute that makes her "different"? I only ask because I did and it did shake my confidence as a child. Believe it or not I can still struggle with it today. I was that child hiding behind my mothers legs and then I (literally) grew into the child that stuck out from the crowd. Give it time. Your little girl will find her own way. Just be there to support her when she needs it |
|
My question is -- do you have any advice on helping your child's confidence to grow? During recent parent-teacher conferences, my DD's teacher (first grade) gave us some ideas, but I'd like more. Her teacher says that my DD knows the answers but doesn't speak up in class. My DD has always been shy and introverted, and we try to be very encouraging. When she has success I tell her "You should be proud of yourself!" and try to make sure she has lots of situations where she can "shine" and feel her own success, we're very positive in our household (without being ridiculous about it) ... but I wonder if there are other specific things we can do that we're not doing.
