Sympathy Card Etiquette

[AuntSueto4]

Sympathy Card Etiquette

I’m just wondering about sending a Sympathy Card via email (I found an image on internet to send) to a neighbor (I don’t know her well)who lives in my cooperative housing apt. building, upon the death of her Father. I just found out today that her Father passed away in April 2012. She’s been gone for several months from here, helping to take care of her parents. She just came back, and I just saw her in the hallway today.


Or shall I just put a regular Sympathy card under her door?


Background: I am now living in the cooperative housing apt. building that my Grandma lived in from 1960 – Dec. 1993. I moved in here January 1994.

The culture back then was very neighborly and friendly. When someone’s immediate family passed away, the coop would circulate a Sympathy card for anyone who wishes could sign it, and usually flowers are sent to the service, and people attend the service.

Now, as the older people have moved out or passed away, and there are now younger people moving in, and the culture has drastically changed, less-friendly and much more business-like, and people rarely see each other, each going their own way.


What are your thoughts?

[bunsy]

I'd try to catch her in person and pass on sympathies and a card. If you can't catch her, slip the card in her door. For some reason, that hand written signature is nice to see.

[dara1012]

I wouldn't do a sympathy card via email. They have simple inexpensive ones available. I second what Bunsy said.

[AuntSueto4]

Thank you for your help Bunsy & dara.

I did give her my sympathy when she told me today.


I was thinking of a giving her a real card, but just wondering about if it is possibly more "up-to-date" by sending email.

If it were me, in same situation, I'd like a real card vs email card.

[nevaehsmom327]

I say send a card. They're much more meaningful. And if you're looking to try and keep some of the old culture of the building around, def. try and give her something real, not an email. And maybe see if you can get a few others to sign it?

[AuntSueto4]

Thank You Amy, I agree with you wholeheartedly! Will try to find neighbors willing to sign the card too.

There is a Board Meeting Wednesday, July 8th so I'll see if I can get more signatures, if she's not at the meeting. If she is at meeting, then I can present the card and hopefully others will share their condolances.

[bumblebee23]

I don't agree with the email for that sort of thing. I would get a regular card and slip it under her door.

[ReneeW]

I agree that sending a real, physical "snail mail" card is nice, even if it just has a sentence or two written on it. If you wanted you could also drop off a pan of brownies or a little bouquet or something to brighten her day.