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Post by alipski on Aug 7, 2012 12:14:23 GMT -6
Hi Mommas! I was wondering if anybody had any advice, ideas etc. I am looking for information on caregiver classes. As some of you know, my Mom had a massive stroke in April. We are making preparations to bring her home to my live with my Dad. She is paralyzed in her left arm and leg. She has many other issues as well. My Dad, Sisters and I are wanting to get a little training before she comes home. We will be doing everything from transferring her from a bed to chair or wheelchair, personal Hygiene, etc. I've seen many support groups out there, but not much in terms of training. Any ideas or suggestions? Also, have any of you been a caregiver for a parent in this way? What was your experience? I miss the old Mom tremendously, but need to get over that and move forward. Man, that's hard!! Anyway, anything you've got would be great, ladies!
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Post by sarahisis on Aug 7, 2012 12:25:55 GMT -6
Dara may be more help on recommending a specific training company...... but...
We go through training of this kind when hired for a caregiver job but it's usually through the company. A hospital may be able to help with a recommendation; but if your mom is seeing a physical therapist, I would see if they can help train you on transfers so you don't hurt yourself or your mom... as far as personal hygeine goes, I would do only what you have to do and your mom is not capable of on her own... and what you are comfortable with vs. your dad or siblings, may be different. a shower chair would be a great help and bars to hold onto in the tub (again, a PT would be able to help you with this stuff as well)... I am a certified PT aide, and have all my materials somewhere on how to safely do all this stuff... If I can find them, you are welcome to borrow them!
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Post by merrr on Aug 7, 2012 17:42:52 GMT -6
HOORAY!!! Mom's coming home soon!!! After my Grandma had a stroke a few years back she lost her independence as well. She now lives with my mom and dad. It's been a hard transition for everyone but it's so much better than having her in a home. What I've seen as an outsider looking in is that the primary care provider (in this case your father) will need some mental health breaks to be away from home. That said, they usually feel guilty for needing to be away so if you can think of errands to send him away while you or your sister is in charge it will give him a purpose and, eventually, he will learn to look forward to the "errands." When my other Grandma's health was declining due to cancer in her brain she also lost her mobility. She needed help with everything. The simplest tasks became extended engagements. A potty break required two assistants to maneuver her to the seat correctly (she'd be so embarrassed if she knew I shared that!). But my Grandpa and my aunt who lived close to her were there every day, day in and day out. It took a toll on them too but they felt they were the only ones who could take care of her properly. I share this part of the story so you know that even if you try to prompt your Dad to run an errand, he may not want to. It's okay. He'll get there when he's ready. I echo the comments from Sarah above. Contact the hospital and nursing home resources. There are some gems that work in those areas (and some inconsiderate pricks too) and it's important to tap into the good resources they have to offer. I know Regions Hospital offers a monthly Stroke Support Group that is open to the public. Something to think about. *hugs*
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Post by AuntSueto4 on Aug 8, 2012 3:34:43 GMT -6
Hi Amy, {{{HHHUUUGGGSSS}}} first of all!!!! I have been following your Mom’s CaringBridge site, but have not posted. Glad to read that your Mom has been making progress in healing and may be going home relatively soon. It’s ok to acknowledge missing your old Mom. I think there is like a “grieving process” people go thru, when this happens. Yes, it is hard, but go at your own pace, and don’t beat yourself up over how long it takes to “get over that and move forward.” “I miss the old Mom tremendously, but need to get over that and move forward. Man, that's hard!! I agree with sarahisis and merrr suggestions. I have been a Nurse’s Aide caring for patients in several Nursing homes, until I hurt my back and had to quit. Outside of that, I have helped quite a few Seniors get the things they need, and advocating for them when needed. “Cadillac of Walkers” for my neighbor, and then I helped her with getting accessories, some of which I created for her. New litter bag attached to handle to put her cordless phone inside, so she’d have it everywhere she went. A whistle, to call for help, as she lived alone in my apt bldg, and someone could help her. Plastic tray to put on walker seat, so she could have her meals there; nylon bag for her walker basket, so small items wouldn’t fall thru. A friend of mine needed ideas to help her Dad after his stroke, so I looked up many resources/helpful items. It is in a Microsoft Word document. Not sure how to get it to you. Can you pm me your email? I’ll send it as an attachment so it will keep the pictures seeable. I don’t know where you all can get training, but I would think the Physical Therapist working with your Mom, would be able to help, and show you how, or give you resources to connect with. Here are a couple of links to help. After Stroke Care: How to Know What's Needed www.caring.com/articles/after-stroke-care#comment-widgetCaring.com is a good site with LOTS of helpful information. www.caring.comResources for stroke survivors and their caregivers www.allinahealth.org/ac/strokemanual.nsf/page/resources
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Post by alipski on Aug 8, 2012 8:24:48 GMT -6
Thanks everyone! You're awesome! I did email the brain injury institute and the MN stroke assoc. for ideas as well. I know we plan to work with her physical therapist, too and have her come out to the house to evaluate it. Just hit another bump in the road, hopefully it won't be too much but, We (my Dad, sister Pam, and myself) spent the whole day Monday in the ER with Mom.
Pam went to see her on her way to work and she heard the nurses yelling to get into 309 (mom's room) Pam got in there and she had been sweating like crazy, throwing up and passed out completely unresponsive. She looked awful, so she went to my Dad's to tell him instead of calling. Pam was afraid she was dying. Dad, of course, left right away and Pam and my Dad met Paramedics at St. Joes.
She was extremely dehydrated, had a bad UTI and her gastroparesis was making her constipated, she hadn't gone in 4 days. The way gastroparesis works is that she can't digest well and it stays in her stomach fermenting, so no wonder she vomits. There was something very different about her, so we were worried there was something else going on but they sent her back to the Home.
Yesterday morning, Pam stopped on her way up and she had another episode. Long story short, we found out she is likely having seizures. She had 5 or 6 yesterday. She gets sweating and clammy, stares off for a minute then eyes rolling back in the head and she's out. It's been really scary. The last one she had at dinner time, my Dad thought she was dead. Pam was up with him and then I went up to relieve them before her bedtime. She seemed great when I 1st got there, then very confused and acting strange to me. Not sure what's going on right now. We will hopefully be able to get her to a neurologist today, as they couldn't get her in yesterday. Hopefully this can be treated with seizure meds and we can still bring her home. the nursing home she is at is fine, but she rarely DOESN'T have a UTI and I am thinking they aren't cleaning her properly. Aunt Sue, you're right, I should take my time with Grieving, but I once I let myself start, I have a hard time pulling it together. We were very close and I'm just trying to get used to the new her.
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Post by sarahisis on Aug 8, 2012 9:30:07 GMT -6
I hope seeing a neurologist helps and you get some more of those answers you are looking for!! Prayers for strength go out to all of you!! Hugs!
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Post by merrr on Aug 8, 2012 14:28:17 GMT -6
Oh hun... I'm so sorry to hear of the setbacks. You are correct in assuming they staff isn't cleaning her properly and that's what is leading to the UTI. When my Grandma has been in TCU's she really suffers and more often than not ends up with UTIs simply because the staff either isn't attentive to each patients needs enough or they aren't fully staffed to support the number of patients they have.
Since she has the issues with eating/digesting, what about administering IV fluids to help her flush out the UTI?
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Post by dara1012 on Aug 8, 2012 17:17:54 GMT -6
Oh Amy! I am sorry your mom and family are going through this. I will ask the Director of Development at my work is she has any good recommendations for training programs for your family as you become caregivers. All of my training and my employee's training is through our company but we don't train people outside of the company. Deb has great networks in the caregiving community. I'll let you know what she says. Hang in there!
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Post by dara1012 on Aug 10, 2012 6:52:21 GMT -6
I sent an email to our Director of Development and she passed it along to someone named Lori LaBey who works for an organization supporting people and their families who have Alzheimer's while your mom's stroke isn't Alzheimer's some of her things may be helpful to you. Lori's website reply to my inquiry was: "I would say a caregiver coach could be appropriate depending on their needs. Do they need someone on site or could a phone call or skype work for them? I might be able to help depending on the needs. I’d be glad to talk with them. They don’t want home health care to assist them? I’m having a radio show tomorrow with a caregiver coach she might want to call in and get some free advice." Here is the link to the show. www.blogtalkradio.com/alzheimersspeaks/2012/08/09/dementias-caregiving-tips-for-surviving-the-journey Neither one of them was familiar with a caregiving class for families. I would suggest contacting Courage Center, Brain Injury Alliance of MN and Bethesda to see what resources they have. Wish I could be more helpful, thinking of you and your family and sending hugs!
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Post by alipski on Aug 10, 2012 9:55:56 GMT -6
You are all so amazing. Thanks Dara for doing that!!! We do have home health care being lined up but they won't be there 24-7 so, we all want to be able to help her out. I will check this out! Thanks again! Hugs!
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Post by AuntSueto4 on Aug 13, 2012 22:40:01 GMT -6
I hope seeing a neurologist helps and you get some more of those answers you are looking for!! Prayers for strength go out to all of you!! Hugs! Hi Amy, Just checking in to see if your Mom has seen the neurologist, and any results. How's your Mom been doing since you last posted about the bump in the road? How's the rest of the family, including you doing? {{{{{HHUUGGSS to all}}} "Aunt Sue, you're right, I should take my time with Grieving, but I once I let myself start, I have a hard time pulling it together. We were very close and I'm just trying to get used to the new her. " Amy, that's OK, it will take time, doesn't usually happen overnight. Hopefully you have a "safe place" to grieve. Have you found any stroke support groups for family members? Or, even if there is someone you can talk to where your Mom is, such as a social worker or Chaplin. Glad you came here for support too!!!
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