Crying All the Time - what to do?

[dara1012]

DS turns 5 in a couple of days and in the past 2 weeks he has gone from a sensitive kid to an overly sensitive kid. He cries all the time. Today he has had 5 different instances of crying. One was because he couldn't draw a perfect picture of a chocolate bunny, another time was he couldn't build his Legos the way he wanted, another time was because I suggested he have a rest time, etc.

We tried talking to him about what is going on. He says his classmates are mean, but when pressed it sounds like they aren't doing anything abnormal for preK kids. His teacher says she hasn't seen anything, they have a 1:8 ratio so I am pretty sure they would know if something is going on. He cried this week about having to wear his winter coat again, yesterday because his recorded book wouldn't play one page, he cried about which seat to sit at last night for dinner. He said "lots of sad things are happening", but there isn't anything DH and I can think of that he would be upset about.

I don't know if it is an "emotional" growth spurt of sorts, or if he has been so excited to turn 5 for the past year (seriously he told me in Sept he can't wait to turn 5) that now that it is happening, there is a let down of expectations he had.

Anyone been through this and have advice?

[lilmermaid]

Oh boy! Sounds like you have hit all the major areas that would be causing some emotions. It could be a growth phase. I guess I would just keep asking questions and see if you can get to the bottom of the problem.
DD1 is my emotional one. We try to remind her that it's not the end of the world if things don't end up how she wants them. When she was younger I would stress what we do and don't cry over. Showing how silly it was to cry over one thing but then showing how it was okay to cry over something that really is sad. It's so much easier now that she's older even though she is still very emotional.
Good Luck!

[sharon]

Ian can be quite emotional at times. We find the best we can do often is model how to be calm and empathize. He just gets more worked up if he feels like no one is listening. So even if it's something I totally don't think he should be freaking over, I still say something like "I'm sorry that's so upsetting for you." But then we also just walk away and try not to feed into it. Listen, empathize, and move on is our way I guess.

[ReneeW]

Awww poor kiddo! It's no fun to be feeling upset so often. Is he an outdoorsy kid who's sick of being stuck inside with this weather? I swear some days I want to sit down and cry, too! But if that's not the case, maybe you can talk to him about using his words more -- like, "Use your words to tell me how you're feeling, but I can't understand when you're crying," type of thing. DD 1 is emotional and cries easily (as do I, so I totally get it) but I do try to get her to take a deep, calming breath, settle down a bit and then use her words to explain. And I agree with you that it could just be a stage, lots of growth and internal changes going on that he is dealing with and will get through in time.

[bumblebee23]

I found with my boys when they get like this they aren't getting enough sleep. OMG I thought I was raising PMSing teenagers it was getting so bad. My youngest was the worst and it was a lot like you are describing. I found out that when I was telling them bed time he was staying up in his room with hidden flashlights and playing cars, reading, or whatever and staying up really late which was making him overtired and extremely emotional.

I can tell when he gets in the habit of not sleeping again cause he throws a tantrum like a toddler. My other son gets emotional too but he will get really angry and upset (usually with his brother) and it will turn into crying. Or if he gets into trouble, can't go out with his friends, or messing up on something (I have found he tends to be kind of a perfectionist) his frustrations turn into tears. I just try to calm him down and tell him it's ok or not so much a big deal and reassure him about certain things.

[Samantha]

My daughter goes through periods like that, she's 4 and there are days where she will cry about EVERYTHING from the socks she doesn't want to wear to not being able to decide if she wants water or milk to drink. She gets angry and has a bad attitude along with it. I've noticed these happen when something new or tiring is going on, like when she started daycare or whenever she stayed at grandmas or grandpas for the weekend or if she just hasn't been sleeping well enough. I think that growing might affect it too, you know they're learning a lot everyday and it can be a lot to take in and deal with.

I sometimes wonder if I went back to having quiet time or nap time if it'd help my dd.

[dara1012]

Thanks all for the feedback. He has been much better the past 2 days. Glad to have my happy kiddo back. I do think some of the issues were because of being overtired, but he refused to nap or got to bed early (it just led to more crying).

I think with his sensitiveness this is something we will have to deal with every once in awhile.

[bumblebee23]

When the boys were younger they would nap at daycare but I could NEVER get them to take a nap for me! It was so frustrating.