Kids & Picky Eating

[ReneeW]

So here's the scoop. Last night my DH brings up to me that he thinks our kids are too picky when it comes to food. We had a discussion about it, and I think we have slightly differing opinions and I'm wondering what your take is -- if you have any insight that'd be great. TIA!

My DH thinks that we make what we want to eat and the kids eat it or go hungry. End of discussion.

My view is: I make what I want, but I make sure that we have plenty of healthy side dishes that will allow the kids to have a nutritious meal, even if they don't like the main dish. They have to try everything on their plate, but they don't have to clean their plate.

The reason I'm leaning toward my view is:
1) I don't want to get into fights over food. Especially having girls, the last thing I want is to have battles at dinner and have them develop eating disorder when they are teenagers. To me, it's not worth the risk.
2) My goal is that my kids eat nutritious foods, even if they don't eat as much of a variety as I'd like, because as they grow up they will theoretically expand upon what they'll eat. From what I read, kids as adults will eat like their parents, and I eat a LOT of healthy, healthy food (quinoa, kale, salads, fish, you name it I'm easy to please).
3) My DH HATES fruit. He won't eat berries, citrus, most fruits actually, so I think it's quite hypocritical of him to be up in arms because our kids are "picky."

As you can see, I'm kind of struggling with this issue. I see his point, our kids ARE pretty boring eaters. But aren't most kids boring eaters? I think that relatively speaking, they do pretty well! They won't eat brussels sprouts, it's true. But they both had kale-berry smoothies for breakfast. They have to taste everything, and they do (not without a bit of procrastinating but they do taste it because that's been our policy forever). Any insight? Am I being a pushover?

[bunsy]

I agree with you 100%. As a mom of 3 now grown children, it worked for us. I am a picky eater so the variety wasn't vary wide with foods as they grew up. I HATE veggies so we had very few of those. There was always fruit, bread & butter, yogurt, pickles, carrot sticks or something so I knew there was something everyone would eat. When they got older, they were allowed to make themselves a pb sandwich if they wanted. But I wasn't making a separate meal.

Dh was raised eating everything put before him no matter what. I grew up putting the 6 green beans I was forced to eat in my mouth at the same time and washing them down with my milk. I don't get the point. I STILL hate vegetables and I don't think 6 green beans gave me that much nutrition.

I have an active gag reflex and if I try to force myself to eat something, it just doesn't work. I couldn't force that on my kids because I understood.

All 3 of my kids are adventurous and good eaters now. Well, DD isn't always but she's weird.

Eating is not worth the fight. As long as they are eating some different things and aren't just eating candy, ice cream and crackers they will be fine. Now that I think of it, my niece ate hot dogs and cheerios exclusively until she was 8. She's 35 and fine too.

[sarahisis]

I agree with you, kids are boring eaters, but as long as they are trying new things, I don't see any problem with them being picky. One of these days they'll try something and love it.. it's all trial and error.

ds is really picky, but so am I.. before I moved to MN my doc wanted to get me "tested" to see if I'm a super taster. Really, even if it doesn't have a taste, I can taste it... I remember throwing up in Kindergarten because I tried a little salad. ugh.

But Preston will try things once in a while.. but I typically make things that he will eat, because he WILL choose to go hungry if I try and force food on him. Eating disorders, in girls especially would definitely be something I'd worry about if they ended up choosing to never eat.

I think you are doing it right already!

[apryllraye87]

I definitely agree with you- DS has to try everything on his plate, but I ensure that we have healthy side dishes that he can eat if he doesn't like the main dish. I also don't want to start a power struggle with him over food, as long as he's eating healthy, and trying some of everything (and not making rude faces if he doesn't like something), that's fine with me.

[onlyoneboy]

I agree with you as well. we do the same thing at our house. DS has to taste everything, if after eating what he does like he is still hungry he can have a sandwich. I know I make things that he won't like but he has to try them anyway. Sometime's he's surprised and loves it.

[jrose]

I agree! I always make sides the girls like and will eat (they thankfully eat most veggies and fruits) If I make a new entree they have to take a couple bites first to decide if they like it or not before getting anymore food. If I make something they don't like but DH and I want I will make them something different whether it would be a sandwich or a piece of chicken. I don't like the idea of letting them go hungry if they don't like something we make...seems kind of mean to me.

[healerarina]

DD1 isn't too picky, I usually make her eat one serving, if she doesn't like it, she doesn't have to eat more. I am more trying to teach her to be polite, rather than anything else. I do give her watered down juice, because she has gagged herself on plain water. She would rather dehydrate than drink plain water. She doesn't like soda either.

DD2 on the other hand, is a very picky eater, but will drink pretty much anything. I can understand with her allergy about being picky. She will barely eat veggies, but she will eat any type of fruit. She will eat the occasional meat stick or baby hot dog, but mainly she eats chicken nuggets or pb&j. She likes hamburgers as well. I will give her a bit of what the rest of us are eating, then make her something else later. But she is still a toddler, so we shall see what happens as she grows.

DH grew up with the you eat what is put in front of you or you don't eat. I grew up with the if you don't like it, make something else. My sister was super picky and wouldn't eat meat for the longest time.

[lilmermaid]

I also agree with you and most of what the other Ladies are saying!

[ReneeW]

Thanks for the input! I really, really appreciate it!