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Post by dara1012 on Oct 31, 2011 21:50:57 GMT -6
Wondering how many of you schedule time to be intimate (meaning plan ahead)?
In my 20's it felt like whenever the "mood" struck we would make time and it was a frequent occurrence. Fast forward to our 30's, 2 FT jobs, grad school and a 3 yo. and it feels like when it isn't scheduled it doesn't happen.
Anyone put it in their planner?
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Post by outdoorsmommy on Nov 1, 2011 6:01:29 GMT -6
There was about month when things were just crazy hectic around our husband and my DH suggested we should start scheduling but I threw that idea right off the table. Personally I just felt like if we scheduled it it would almost feel like a job and what if that day you schedule it on you are just completing exhausted and have no interest do you do it anyways then.
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Post by apryllraye87 on Nov 1, 2011 6:24:15 GMT -6
I'm in my 20's and I already feel like we need to schedule sex.. lol
But in all seriousness I agree with outdoorsmommy.. I feel like if it was scheduled it would become more like a job and it wouldn't be fun anymore. I think it would be become more about "getting it done" if I was tired and exhausted just because we had already planned it.
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Post by jessijo on Nov 1, 2011 7:47:30 GMT -6
Sometimes I do schedule it! I have often told my hubby or he tells me - tonight's the night. We also do it when the mood strikes but we promised each other a few years ago to make time to have sex 3 times a week at least. It has made both of us much happier!
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Post by jrose on Nov 1, 2011 7:56:31 GMT -6
At one point not too long ago we made Sunday....Sunday Funday of course after the girls went to bed. That didn't last too long I started to see it more as a chore and not enjoy it anymore. So when it happens it happens....even when I'm very very tired I try to give into his needs as much as possible...he seems to need it more than me lol.
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Post by kristin8888 on Nov 1, 2011 8:01:28 GMT -6
We don't really schedule it but with us working opposite shifts and DH working 6 days a week we just take advantage of the times we can. Usually Saturday afternoons, Sunday afternoons and sometimes after DH gets home from work he will wake me up if he knows I don't have to work the next day.
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Post by cakemakermom on Nov 1, 2011 8:17:15 GMT -6
We don't schedule, but we tend to do Sautrdays because it's more convienent, we can sleep in the next day and are rested up from the week of having to get up every morning. I'm jealous of those 3x a week, I'm lucky if I get 3x a month. Plus my libido is starting to wane, so we're getting on the same mood page.
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Post by megs25 on Nov 1, 2011 9:57:56 GMT -6
I think I schedule it in my head. I feel DH works nights and I'm in school, so its very difficult to be in the mood specifically on the nights we actually see eachother. Me peak in their 20s and women, not until their 40s! Maybe we can meet happily in the middle in our 30s??
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Post by nevaehsmom327 on Nov 1, 2011 10:41:24 GMT -6
Ugh...we "schedule" it. We always know that Tuesday nights are a good night, because DH doesn't work and he usually has hockey late, so after hockey he comes home and well...you know! lol other than that, we just try to squeeze it in wherever we can!
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Post by deannemdm on Nov 1, 2011 10:52:12 GMT -6
WE don't schedule it-- unless we plan a night away-- so not too often. When we started dating it was 3 x a night 3-4 days a week (we were in mid 20s), NOW--- well maybe a few times a month. Hubby has rotating 12 hour shifts so his sleep schedule is crazy---DS doesn't nap anymore so thank eliminates afternoons-- most of the time. Of course, we are now 40 and 42 so I think that affects it as well.
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Post by danikasmom on Nov 1, 2011 12:46:00 GMT -6
Sometimes we will set the alarm 20 minutes earlier to sneak in a quicky!! We haven't had to do that yet, but sometimes morning sex is a fun way to start the day!!!
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Post by gwensmama9206 on Nov 1, 2011 13:42:33 GMT -6
Nope, we do it whenever and wherever when we get in the mood. Tirednees usually doesn't seem to stop us. DH had H1N1 a couple years ago and it still didn't stop him from jumping me lol
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Post by jess7882 on Nov 1, 2011 20:13:41 GMT -6
Nope...just whenever the mood strikes.
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Post by Mandan914 on Nov 1, 2011 20:31:40 GMT -6
DH a while back heard of a way to schedule sex without it having to be a chore.. its called a bean in the jar..
the way it works is: each month or week each person is given however many beans as you agree on for that week or month, whoever is feeling like they want to be intimate will put a bean in the jar in the bedroom, the other person has 24 hours from when they see it to respond.. at their own timing.. If they dont fulfil the bean request they must forfit the bean and one of their own, to the other person..
We tried it out and it is super nice bc if you see the bean and your just not feeling it at the moment you still have a whole day to fulfil it.. and it doesnt feel like a schedule..
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Post by dara1012 on Nov 1, 2011 21:26:16 GMT -6
Really interesting concept Mandan.....
I honestly started to struggle w/ being in the "mood" after fertility treatment required sex at certain times and not at others...it took all the fun out of it. Then we had our son and it just is harder to find time when you have a kiddo. I struggle with scheduling because even if I agree to have sex on Tuesday night for example....after Tuesday's day at work I might not feel like it and then DH gets frustrated because I "agreed" to it.
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