Messages you give your teens about body image

[ReneeW]

I just wanted to bring up a little reminder for my fellow exercising moms out there. I was working out at the gym recently in a quieter area where two teenage girls were talking. I couldn't help but overhear their conversation, and it really made me sad--and made me think. One was saying that her mom wanted her to join a "Boot Camp" class for teens, and when she looked up the info it was a "losing weight" type class. This kid was NOT overweight, she looked very healthy and normal--not too skinny or overweight. So she's talking about how her mom runs for miles every day and thinks she's fat and etc. etc. ... really broke my heart.

Anyway, I try to tell my kids that I exercise to keep my heart and muscles healthy and strong, I try to not discuss my weight or "dieting" or anything along those lines at all. When we talk about food I try to tell them we eat a "variety of healthy foods" because we want to have energy to play and grow and learn ... Am I forgetting anything? Any other tips of sending your kids positive messages about exercising and food?

[deannemdm]

I don't exercise much-- I only do karate and emphasize I do it because yelling and sweating are great are great stress relievers. (of course i border on underweight most days) I eat when I'm hungry and encourage my kids to do the same. I offer them food and try to have mostly healthier choices-- string cheese, whole grain bread and pasta, fruit, and my kids LOVE fruit. I even have clif brand fruit twists-- like a fruit snack or licerice but made of organic apple puree and fruit and veggie colors. I let them have candy (after halloween after all) but not excessively (more than they should I think sometimes). I have always been small and light weight and it is not due to any effort on my part. My kids are 10 and 2.5 so not a huge issue yet-- but DD at 10 is starting to get some of those messages.

[JazzyMaxie]

At 6 years old, I hear Langston talk about not wanting to be fat. I have never said anything about him being fat. However, I do use myself and my family as examples of what can and will happen to the bodies in our family. After spending several weeks with his sedentary grandparents, I see that he has the same potential that has plagued us all. But, the kid enjoys staying active and is usually pretty good about his food choices. As a matter of fact, the kid usually eats more than me...and he is still pretty lean.

[bumblebee23]

My 8 yo son was coming home telling me he was fat and that he needed to lose weight. He was taking whatever was being said in health class a bad way saying I can only eat this and not that. His Dr told me he was considered obease (sp) and that really really upset me. I think their weight charts at the Dr's office are crazy. My son is a little on the heavier side but I do not in any way think my son is obease. He is a little chunky but I am really not worried about it. His dad was a bigger kid. It's not like my son doesn't do anything he is constantly running around in the summer, riding his bike and playing with his other friends. In the winter he does tend to migrate in the house but I don't like the cold either.

I think society as a whole and not just parents contribute to the problem. At least the Dr whispered the O word to me and my son didn't hear it because I would have had to give him a lecture otherwise.

[laurac]

My oldest is 21 and in his last year of school and has put on weight but he is pretty slim anyway. My middle son just started college and he couldn't gain weight if he wanted to. My daughter is days from being 16 and we've never talked about her weight. I want her to be confident no matter what size she is. She is not skinny but not fat but does talk about feeling fat. She has a BFF who is anorexic and feels she has to be perfect all the time and it really bugs my DD.

I think it is absolutely TERRIBLE when mothers tell their daughters they need to lose weight. Those mothers should be slapped. That self image is what they will struggle with their whole life.