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Post by lilmermaid on Aug 29, 2012 15:21:50 GMT -6
I think everyone has their own version of "active" parenting. I guess I don't mind my DH watching TV WITH my DDs on the weekdays. They DVR certain shows to watch together. I also don't mind if he's checking FB on his phone or working on the computer. He's still paying attention to them. It's just too tough for him to do anything more during the weeknights. On the weekends they often go to the Dojo with him or help him workout in the basement.
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Post by bumblebee23 on Aug 30, 2012 12:31:43 GMT -6
I was never one to really get down on the floor and play these ellaborate games with my kids and neither was DH. So it could be that he just doesn't know how to relate to a child. Also my husband works anywhere from 40 to 80 hr work weeks during the summer and we would barely see him let alone him really spend any quality time with the boys but he was seasonal and in the winter months he was laid off and the boys where with him and he would bring them ice fishing and stuff occasionally but for the most part they hung around the house. I dont' harp on him to much to spend time with the boys because he works so much but I do also try to plan things that give us quality time together. Like going to the movies, or the fair, children's museum, etc that way we are all together.
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Post by jrose on Aug 30, 2012 12:58:32 GMT -6
DH is pretty active with the girls. Some times he can be pretty good at tuning them out when theres baseball or football on the tv...i just yell at him to snap him back haha. The girls do enjoy just snuggling with him and watching tv since he works so much. They like to play downstairs while he is doing his workout too. He tries his best to give them his attention.
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Post by deannemdm on Aug 31, 2012 7:35:27 GMT -6
My Dh is ...ehh... He works and makes good money while I stay at home. He comes and goes as he pleases and i feel like i have to get permission or make sure it is ok if i leave. He will play with the kids-- sometimes-- he won't take DS on playdates (he is introverted and doesn't know other moms) and that's ok-- he will take DD to soccer practice/games. He has taken DS to toddler sports stuff. I think it is easier for him once the kids are older and can do stuff he can relate to easier. He does many errands on his time off. I am able to take a class one night a week to upgrade my counseling license-- but he has rotating 12 hour shifts so every other week i need to find sitter for kids during my class. I also can go to karate practice when he is not scheduled. He does tend to pick up overtime-- sometimes a lot! (up to 60 hrs a pay period). We just got back from camping monday-friday and he works all weekend overnights. He cooks, pays bill, buys groceries, helps with dishes and laundry. I do most of the laundry, cleaning bathrooms, some of the kitchen, and lots with the kids--- he gets annoyed i think when he comes home and the house is a mess and finds me on the computer.-- when he watches the kids-- he will often have kids' channel on and be watching netflix or sports on internet and drinking beer. Luckily DD will be 11 on Wed so she can help with DS (age 3.5). I hate to have to give her that resposibility when her dad is home, but...sometimes she just has to-- with his sleep schedule from rotating shifts every few days he can fall asleep (and with beer) and be really tough to wake up.
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Post by dara1012 on Aug 31, 2012 16:19:04 GMT -6
DH is really good in some respects and not as much in others. He is super helpful and flexible w/ picking up and dropping off from daycare b/c he works at home and can stop whenever he needs to. Without his help I would never be able to do grad school so I am very grateful for that. However often he won't put in the extra effort to go to storytime or Sunday School or a more hands on activity like painting. I do most of the getting him to swim lessons. But if I have class or a work commitment he will do the things we've paid for (so swim lessons but not storytime). He is really good at helping him learn to write his letters, but he definitely spends time on his computer (though w/ school and work I do too). DH also doesn't multi-task well. If he is with DS alone he won't do dishes, clean bathroom, do laundry which are all things I do on my nights home. But he will make sure he is fed and clean (and sometimes helps him clean up his toys). I would say that he is becoming more active the older DS gets. I think he is just becoming more comfortable with creative ideas in the past few months. Yesterday he encouraged DS to play school with his stuffed animals.
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